This time in my life is helping me think of how we normally get caught up in the do-ingness of our lives.

Somehow most of us have bought into the Protestant Work Ethic that says that we are defined by our productivity; we are good because we do well.  If we work hard enough, are frugal and disciplined we will be rewarded spiritually and economically because of that ethic. 

No matter what our religion or if in fact we have no religious ideology most of us buy into the view that hard work is equal to happiness, a sense of worthiness and eventually eternal salvation.

As we experience this 2020 Easter season, we are in fact invited to examine that premise in a most unusual way.  By being alone with self we can take this time to look at who we are, how we are living and how did we get here.   If our aim in life is for autonomy and independence with no showing of our own vulnerability, then as a society we have achieved that goal. How sad that is.

 As individuals it is harder to maintain that stoicism facade and the cost to us as humans is heavy.  The price is of that work ethic and its resulting behaviours are that we live in fear.  We fear illness, frailty, disability, poverty and aging.  All of those fragilities mean a loss of independence and public showing of our dependence and vulnerability.  We are fearful of public shaming.  We are fearful of failing at whatever standards our society sets for us as productive humans. 

Our freedom to be fully human begins, I think, when we accept, and then embrace our dependence and our interdependence.  Accepting our lives as a gift frees us from the burden of becoming a human doing and not a human be-ing.  We do not have to make our voices count more than another.  We are loved and we live on account of that love.  We can know that life is a gift that keeps on coming means that we do not have to cling desperately to our sense of importance or self in the fear that really giving and accepting others as important as we are does not diminish my worth. I can freely share my compassion.

Only then can we live freely and joyously because we are spared the impossible task of trying to prove our worthiness to a judgmental God. We are loved because we exist which gives us enormous freedom just to be.

 Many years ago I had an elderly client, who shared a little parable with me.  But first she asked me if I loved my children equally and I replied that I loved my children as they are because they are so different from each other.  Then she asked if I believed that God loved me as a parent. In response I might have given her therapy double speak by responding “Can you tell me what you believe”. So she did so; by saying this…

Well… I believe that like many parents God loves his children as they need to be loved at various times in their lives, and that God has his children’s pictures on his night table and each evening he looks at each of us and tells us how much he loves us.  He does not interfere with our life in a direct way but he knows that if you have faith that you will handle whatever happens. 

I am not sure how theologically sound my client’s metaphor is, but I know that it sows seeds of faith and forgiveness.  My client did not believe that she was owed any promises of an easy or a rich life but she did know she did not ever walk alone. 

I think that this message is important for us to hear now, especially because it is Easter on Sunday.  The days before Easter for me are times of reflection and to let our collective grief about our human limitations come to the surface. 

My question for myself this week is: Would I stand up every time and speak for goodness and truth or would I go with the flow and tell myself to ‘just once in your life try to fit in by shutting up about what you think, believe or know to be true’.

I am not sure if there is an easy answer to that question that I know I have been asking since I was a young child but I know that every day I try and that many time I have failed but I will keep on